1. Lily
2. Lily-dog
3. Lily-pup
4. Lilliput
5. Lilyfluff
6. Lily-caerphilly
7. Lils

8. Pup
9. Puppy
10. Puppy-dog
11. Puppy-frog
12. Round Hound
13. Rotundo

14. Wonky Donkey
15. Wonks
16. Donkey
17. Donks
18. Donkle
19. Doggles, the dog with goggles
20. Frog
21. Bog dog
22. Mud skipper

23. Fishface
24. Pupples
25. Trouble Bubble
26. Pound Hound
27. Pound Puppy
28. Hoofer
29. Stinker
30. Stinks
31. Stinkles

32. Jiggly puff
33. Jiggly muffin
34. Muffin
35. Wriggles
36. Stinkbomb
37. Old lady
38. Lady
39. Crazy dog (pioneered by Rafal the plasterer)
40. Granddog (what she is to her Granny and Pop-Pops Leach & her GrandParrys)

41. Ms Ears
42. Boggle Eyes
43. Stinkhound
44. Sleepy Frog
45. Sleepy Bear
46. Pooh Bear
47. Bear
48. Pooh
49. Pond Whomper

50. Floppy Ears
51. Grumpy
52. Grumpelstiltskin
53. Grumpel
54. Grumpasaurus
55. Bubby
56. Bubba
57. Bubs
58. HubbaBubba

59. Hot Dog, Jumping Frog
60. Wonderdog
61. Lillian
62. Our Lady of the Hairy Trousers
63. Bilious
64. Bilbo

65. Button nose
66. Button moon
67. Wriggle-de-piggle
68. Wriggly-piggle
69. Wriggle-pup
70. Waggle-pup

71. Barker
72. Barkmachine
73. Woofy
74. Woofles
75. Sulker
76. Sulkamatic 5000
77. The Incredible Sulk

78. Wobbles
79. WobbleBlob
80. Fougher
81. Lily-Beans
82. Beans
83. Beansy
84. Doodle
85. Poodle
87. Poo
88. PoolNoodle

89. Ms Legs
90. Wobbles McDoggles
91. Kaboodle
92. (Collective name with me, Strange & John) The White Belly Crew
93. Bubblebutt
94. Bubblenose
95. Salty Seadog
96. Weebag
97. Lily Bajilly
98. Helicopter Tail
99. The Dog
100. The Best Dog In the World

We said goodbye to Lily today.

She came to live with us in March 2010. She was already an old dog at that point – nine years old – and we thought she’d only be with us for two or three years. In the end, it was just a fortnight under six years, and every single one of those 2,170 days, she’s made us laugh and smile with utter joy.

She went on boats and buses, she dunked in multiple seas and countless streams, she ran around in woodland nearly every day and she made snow angels at every opportunity. She loved Bonios, shoes and getting dry after showers.

She was gentle and goofy, opinionated but well-trained: she knew how to be a dog. She was cheeky, needy, a right pain in the arse at times but she was an darling with it and was rightly loved by many.

She was our dog. We almost certainly will have others in the future but she will always be our first, the special one.

On her second day with us, I told her that in the Peach household, we always start the day with hugs. And every day we did – including today.

We buried her at the bottom of the garden near the beck. The house will be painfully quiet without her.

• John’s photo selection – and videos of her being daft